M. Russell Ballard in "The Divine System Tips"
When members of a family began to realize that his home was being invaded by the containment, convened a family council to discuss the situation . "I started to explain what he had observed and how I felt about it, "said the father." My wife did the same and then each of the seven children were still at home, from oldest to youngest, had the opportunity to express their feelings. "
The parents understood that since older children had left the home, one of them have married and one for college, an unfair burden of responsibility had fallen on two children higher than they were in the house. The council's deliberations resulted in a more equitable distribution of responsibilities among the children and as a significant reduction in the levels of frustration of the family.
Something similar happened to another family of seven children. "As you can imagine, in a house with seven children often frustrated me everyday problems," said the mother. "Occasionally I felt overwhelmed and then I got discouraged. These feelings always passed, but I was wondering if anything would come to move forward one day to be the kind of family we thought we should be."
Then the parents heard a General Authority show that the basic advice of the Church is the family council.
"That impressed me a lot," said the mother. "After talking with my husband, we decided to make our home family councils. We explain to our children and begin to carry out advice every Sunday night.
" I was very favorably surprised results we've had, "said the sister continued." One by one, began to address the problems we saw in our family. Anyway we now consider perfect, but for the first time we're starting to see progress. And when a problem occurs again, just write me a note, as do other members of the family, which took our next council meeting to address them. "
Too often family councils are made only when the parents think there are problems and when they think they have all the answers. In the same way that some presidents and bishops wandering into other councils of the Church to think that it is your responsibility to find all the solutions to the problems facing their organizations, parents deprive a valuable inspiration if you decide not to give due consideration to the ideas that children bring to the board family. Remember that even though the children never have the right to be disrespectful to their parents, they do have their voices heard. They need a calm environment where they can try to rules and principles that they do not understand and where attention. The family council creates the ideal setting for a fruitful communication. The rules and family rules are much better accepted and followed if given to all family members the opportunity to participate and agree about them.
A marriage was very concerned because one of their teenage daughters was surrounded by friends whose values \u200b\u200bare very different taught by the family and the Church. They were concerned particularly the relationship that was developing between her daughter and a young man of dubious reputation. Tried to combat such adverse situation posed to her daughter through a set of new family rules, threats and disciplinary measures. But that served only to increase tension and contention in the home.
Finally, the parents decided to form a special family council made up of two of them and their oldest daughter, who was a year older than what was going on hard times. "The three of us cried to share feelings of mutual love and fear regarding the direction that appeared headed for our second daughter, "said the father." Our oldest daughter respectfully suggested that we should stop criticizing the friends of her sister because she ran the risk of alienating us. Recommended that we create a friendly atmosphere in our home that would encourage our other daughter to bring their friends home, where we could perhaps also be a good influence for them. "
After much thought, fasting and prayer, especially family council made a plan: try to be as positive as possible and strive to uncover the good in friends of his daughter. "We wanted to be friends of friends so that they were not as likely to influence our daughter to resist us," added the father. "Also, we encourage you to invite your friends to come to our house often. That way we could observe them more closely, allowing her, at the same time, satisfy their social needs."
special family council also decided to invite the missionaries to dinner more often. "As our daughter was developing an understanding of missionaries and relying more on them, it was natural and logical that we were to suggest that she invite their friends to hear the missionary discussions, "said the father." We congratulate him that was the only missionary active in our family and anyone else that she had friends who were not members of the Church who can present the Gospel message. "
The resulting missionary experiences were stocked. When the missionaries taught him the best friend of the couple, said they were some of the lessons Spiritual ever been given. When I taught the boy, however, no talks were very well received. But even that had a positive outcome with regard to the family. "After two or three weeks notice that the young man stopped coming and calling," said the father. "Later we learned that he was telling others that our family was too 'Mormon' to him."
Those good parents say that the suggestion of his eldest daughter at the family council special was what kept the family together. "We are very grateful that the Spirit of the Lord has worked through it for our family."
And those parents were very wise to pay more attention to the ideas and feelings expressed by her daughter at the family council special.